So Rihanna's album did 181,000 its first week, which sucks ass big time for an artist who is charging 500,000 (yes, its U.S. dollars) to perform for New Years Eve. Sitting here going over her soundscan, it popped in my mind, what would she do if her Label dropped her?? Here is my list of the top 5 jobs that Rihanna could do:
5. McDonald's
I mean after all, they are ALWAYS hiring.. right? Rihanna, just remember that it's service with a smile, not a bad attitude, no matter how nice your accent is. And yes, *sigh*, if Chris ever comes in your location, feel free to hide behind the deep fry until he is gone.
4. Dominatrix
Keeping with this whole "edgy" thing your going with, Im sure you already have the the outfits in your closet. Word of advice though, leave the barb-wire home... *ouch*
3. Phone Girl at the CatHouse
"... Allo? Welcome to the CatHouse.. dis is Rihanna, wa ya want?...." Perfect fit if I do say so myself..
2. Pet Food Taster
After all that madness you talked on your 20/20 interview, you mouth must taste like crap. Im sure Dog food dosent taste any worse. Beefy flavor anyone?
And the top Job that Rihanna could get if she get's dropped by her label:
*drumroll please*
1. Beyonce's Wig Carrier
I know, I know, but Mama Tina was whispering in my ear about this. Look on the bright side.. Jay would have easier access, and you could request a golden brush.. Maybe, just maybe if you behave, Beyonce would even let you sit at the big people's table during family get togethers. Just dont be suprised if Cousin Angie spits in your water. *sigh*
No comments:
Post a Comment