Fuck Effort: Kim Kardashian's new song Jam (Turn it Up)

I blame Candy and Kim Z. from the Housewives of Atlanta for the shit right here...

So as if being America's most loved blowup doll television personality wasn't enough, Kim Kardashian took a page out of Kim Zolciak's book and had The Dream and his smedium jacket produce a single called Jam (Turn it OFF Up).

Guess now that she is no longer a card carrying member of the Reggie Bush Olympic Sperm Catcher team, she must find something to do with her time.

This isnt it. 

At first, should one not look at the screen, you think you are overhearing the exorcism of a cat with Rabies in heat.. and labor. But as your ears slow in the bleeding, you begin to hear the base of the track, and all is well until her verse comes in, and then its every man for himself.

Listen at your own risk.

Donate to the Remain Relevant F und: VH1's Love & Hip-Hop Trailer

Just when I thought there was going to be no ghetto programming to watch with chicken wings and a beer,  VH1 dropped off this amazing little tid bit in my inbox.

Funny enough is I happen to be present at a part of the taping for the series, the segment when Olivia had a listening session for her new music at Veranda in NYC a few months ago. Imagine my surprise when then she opened her mouth to sing and I didn't want to vomit!

Way any, this series follows all the girls in life that nobody cares about ( with the exception of Jim Jones wife ), but somehow, when you pack all their weave, drama and jump-off like tactics into one hour, it actually makes for TV I can bare. Was Ciara not available at the time of taping? A few of her well choreographed body rolls and this show would be ready for the Emmy's! We can only dream.. *sigh*

Series premiers on March 21st...

Love & Hip Hop |Olivia Longott |Somaya Reece |Mashonda Tifrere

Breaking Foxy Brown News...

This just in..

Go ahead, take a second to drink in all the yaki goodness and weave glue that has become Foxy brown..

(and please note, no random chinese people or weave store workers were harmed in the making of this news..)

Foxy Brown announced Friday that she is in the studio recording a double-album, to be the 1st ever released by a female hip-hop artist, called I can't afford Black Roses.

"I'm in the studio every night, slaving.  It's going to be really big. One side is going to be straight Hip Hop and hardcore records, and a couple big radio joints, and then the other side is Dancehall-Rock."

 ummm... yeah. While we here at www.DJNorie.blogspot.com are very happy that you have taken your inspiration from all things Yaki (let the weave strengthen you), not sure how I feel about a double sided album. After your last master piece that went triple WOOD , 

maybe a double sided album isn't for you. That is unless you pull a Ciara and offer a free album with chicken, 

 and donate a portion of the proceeds to  all the people formerly  injured by your damn shinanagans...


 #imjustsayin. 

The Good Stuff Kids Grow On- "Big Booty B*&^hes"

I blame @MikeMillz_TN for destroying all that is right in the world by showing me this video.
But with 10,000,000 + hits, I had no choice to watch it and see what was going on.

That was the beginning of the end.

I couldn't decide whether twiddle dumb in the church outfit was catching the holy spirit at the thought of "Big Booty Bitches", or if he was doing a crack shimmy, but needless to say the shit is entertaining. Somewhere, in a far off land, thanks to this song a future video hoe is being granted her necessary silicone injections.

There is a God.

When Hoe Shit Fails- Tiger Woods on Vanity Fair

*Blink*

*Blink*

*Blank Stare*

Im convinced that Tiger's Wife had something to do with this cover... has that man not had enough?? I mean really!! *SMH*

Dear Tiger,

instead of working on your swing you should had been working on your pimp hand, cause look where your bitches done got you now. Poster boy for EPIC FAIL *insert sad smiley face right here* .

Please feel free to laugh, and then reconsider your hoes.

Donate to the Remain Relevant Fund: Lady Gaga Promo Pic's featuring Kanye West

So everybody's favorite weirdo, Lady Gaga, has released some promo pics, in yet another effort to remain relevant. I spent the better part of an hour trying to figure out if the pic with Kanye West was some display from Madame Tussad's Wax Museum. Minus the blood and creepy twitch, these can be considered fly in some countries..

FYI, Gaga, if your crotch is really giving off fireworks, you might want to get that checked...

EPIC FAIL: Is Tiger Woods Really Kim's "Big Poppa"??

For those of you who watch "The Real Housewives of Atlanta", in light of Tiger Wood's hoe shit counter up to 9 (gotta keep checking), I am now forced to wonder if he's linked to everyone's favorite mistress, Kim. I mean, comeon... "Big Poppa"?

Way any, here's a clip of Kim performing Tardy for the party on the Ellen show.. did I forget to mention that Ellen cut it out, but had to post it on her website? Ellen? how could you? Blond hair, big boobs and no talent is what this industry is built on! *smh* FUCK EFFORT! Ellen, Tiger.. umm.. I mean "Big Poppa's" people will be calling you soon..

NorieTube- World Premier: 50 Cent's "Do You Think About Me"

Aunt Viv is at it again! This time, armed with better plastic surgery.. Shout out to Tamala Jones who looked fabolous in this video as well.. where you been girl??

Anyhoo, shout out to 50 for the natural dramatic cunt that he posses within. Cause we all know, that bathroom scene was some crazy shit that Aunt Viv really did when yall stopped dating, and her career has been on the road to nowhere ever since.


Find more videos like this on ThisIs50.com : IF IT'S HOT IT'S HERE!

Donate to the Remain Relevant Fund: Pics from Rihanna's "Go Hard" Video

Is that the long lost love child of Minnie Mouse and Rambo?

Nope. Its just your local firecrotch Rihanna and pics from her Video shoot with Young Jeezey for her song "Go Hard". She totally had me until the helmet. Somewhere, a pedophile is happy.

This picture makes me feel like she should "go shower".

Isnt it crazy how most people need to actually have on clothes to dress bad, and Rihanna can do it in next to nothing? Don't act like that girl, don't act like that.

Norie Tube- Just for laughs: Would you wine for me?

So Ive been watching this World Star Hip-Hop Clip all afternoon, and its just as funny each time I watch it.. Poor Girl..

DJ Self's 80's Babies @ Nokia Theater!

The video is finally up! Took me forever to edit this one right here...
*giving youtube an extremely dirty side eye* Am I the only one who didn't know there was a maxium length to the time for a youtube video? Geeze..

Way any, here is the video from the concert. It was MADDDD!! Congradulations to da Boy DJ Self! Line was around the block for Nokia Theater from 5:30 and the venue didn't open till 7. Mr. Cheeks, Dru Hill, Next , Retro kids, Greg Nice, Case, Mase... every body came out to have a good time. Mr. Cheeks came in straight from his basement, RL from Next prancing around the stage like he was released straight from jail to come to the concert, and Mase had the same bubble he wore when I was in Junior high.

Please remember to donate to the "Remain relevant fund" on your way out. We take cash, credit, and WIC. May Peace be with you.



Let's talk about Intro, who decided to have the girls come out. What was with the shorty who forgot her jeans and her butt and had the nerve to wear boyshorts? And boy shorts give all girls booty and she still had a case of "washboard back"?? Two Words: EPIC FAIL.

Follow DJ Norie in Real Life- New Jersey International Music Festival

Last Sunday DJ Norie hosted the New Jersey International Reggae Fest in Jersey by Road Block Radio and G-City Promotions. Before I get into the show, I would like to take the time to spotlight the "artist" (cough, cough, *blink*) Barbie.

*Please note, the wonk eye in the photo above is seriously noted- I sure hope that isn't your sexy look* After being ignored and passed over to perform *counting on my fingers* five times, Barbie threw a fit and pointed out the fact that the artist she was put aside for only recieved a mediocre response from the crowd. She the stormed out off the field in her best waiting to exhale moment ( I don't have to take this shit!), only to return to perform minutes to a silent crowd..

*blink*
*blink*
Cue the crickets..

Now I understand what my momma meant when she said sometimes it is better to be seen than heard. Girl.. atleast you have your looks...

body..

whatever..

Way any.. here are the picks.. everyone from the peanut man (how the fuck do peanuts get him everywhere? Im in the wrong profession) to the aunt that you don't tell people about came to perform.

Event Alert! DJ Self Celebrates His 1Yr Anniversary w/ 80's BABIES!

Congradulations to DJ Self from The Union celebrating His 1 year anniversary on Power 105.1fm.

Thursday, October 1st, 2009 DJ Self celebrates his 1yr anniversary on Power 105.1fm with "80's Babies" a live Show featuring Dru Hill with Case, Next, Intro, Mace, Greg Nice & Smooth at Nokia Theater.

Tickets on sale now at TicketMaster.com.